IBFAIBPMSH Chapter 28

If Bai Gaoxing knows that Li Pu is judging him as a fool, he bites him in anger instead of letting the man stroke his head like he is doing now.

After he says "good morning," for some reason, Li Pu doesn’t continue preparing his own meal. Instead, he suddenly smiles and walks over to pet him.

This is really terrible, Bai Gaoxing thinks. It seems he’s really getting used to being stroked.

Although at first, he finds it comfortable to have his head petted and plans to enjoy the perks of being a bird, that is just a fleeting thought, and now…

Where’s the morality? Where’s the bottom line? Where’s human dignity!?

But... he’s a parrot now.

Bai Gaoxing squints as Li Pu’s fingertips rub against his face. When his ear hole, hidden under the fluff, is poked, he can’t help but let out a sharp bird cry, and then he reflexively grips Li Pu’s finger.

Li Pu is momentarily unable to move but doesn’t pull his hand away. Instead, he raises his other hand to continue petting.

The man measures him around for a little bit, feeling a soft, solid mass in the middle of his palm, which seems rounder than when Bai Gaoxing first arrives.

He’s not sure whether it's actual weight gain or just the fluffiness of the feathers…

Bai Gaoxing, who has been humming with his eyes closed, suddenly feels the warmth leave his face, and then a hand grabs his whole body.

He opens his eyes in shock, meeting Li Pu’s slightly questioning expression.

Wha-what’s going on?

Bai Gaoxing notices that Li Pu’s gaze is a little intense, making him nervous. He looks at the man’s phone tucked in his chest pocket.

No light, no movement.

He stares at Li Pu for a long time before hearing him say, “A little fat.”

That’s it? Bai Gaoxing relaxes and looks down at his own plump chest.

It’s fine! Bai Gaoxing doesn’t think he’s changed at all. Besides, isn’t it cute to be a round bird? He doesn’t have to fly much anyway. So he chirps, “Not fat!” and grips one of Li Pu’s fingers with his claws, encouraging him to keep scratching where it feels good.

Really not fat?

Being treated as a human back scratcher, Li Pu lets the parrot grab him while reflecting on what Dabai just said. The sensation of the bird’s claws against his skin is slightly cool, and since the wutong parrot is quite large, the pads of its feet feel particularly solid.

As Bai Gaoxing holds onto his finger, scratching himself, he secretly glances at Li Pu.

Good, it’s time to move on to the second step of the plan.

Bai Gaoxing considers that he’s allowing his head to be scratched on purpose to throw the enemy off. Every action is part of his strategy.

The current plan is simple: first, get Li Pu to lower his guard. Once he puts his phone down and heads to the kitchen, Bai Gaoxing will grab it with his beak and sneak it into a hidden corner. Then, he’ll open the Live streaming account to check on things.

He logged off too quickly last time, and it leaves him feeling uneasy. He’s not sure if that private message has a follow-up or if more people have messaged him. It’s better to check just to be safe.

Sure enough, after a short while, Li Pu withdraws his hand on his own, looking like he is about to make lunch. Bai Gaoxing tilts his head, watching his movements intently, his claws uncontrollably scratching at the table. Quick, quick, put the phone down here—but Li Pu turns around and mercilessly closes the kitchen door behind him.

Wait, no, don’t you feel that phone on your chest is a bit cumbersome? 

Bai Gaoxing pounces on the glass door, his wings flapping wildly. He successfully attracts Li Pu’s attention, and the door opens again. Seizing the opportunity, Bai Gaoxing squeezes through the gap.

Li Pu has just washed his hands, and droplets of water drip from his fingertips, landing right on Bai Gaoxing’s head. Shuddering, Bai Gaoxing climbs up Li Pu’s trouser legs until his claws hook onto his shirt pocket. The two of them lock eyes.

A few seconds pass before Bai Gaoxing breaks the awkward silence: “...phone?”

Lowering his head, he pokes at the exposed phone case with his beak, making a soft, crisp tapping sound.

Li Pu finally shows an expression of barely contained patience, sighs, and without caring about his wet hands, grabs Bai Gaoxing by the base of his wings with one hand, while supporting his rear with the other, and tosses him out of the kitchen.

Bai Gaoxing successfully glides to the ground, but he is confused.

He looks back, and sure enough, Li Pu has placed the phone down, but it is right next to the cutting board.

But the next second, Li Pu pulls at his collar and glances downward.

Uh… is it too hot? Not a fan of close contact?

Bai Gaoxing puzzles over it for a moment, realizing he won’t get another chance to reach the phone. He gives up and runs to the sofa to watch TV instead.

In the kitchen, Li Pu confirms there are no scratches on his body, just a lingering sting.

Parrot claws are indeed sharp, and the bigger the bird, the stronger its grip. With summer approaching and the clothes being lighter, the sudden jolt of pain when Dabai steps on him makes Li Pu’s scalp tingle, not to mention how Bai has climbed up, accidentally pinching his skin with his beak a few times along the way.

Li Pu holds the kitchen knife thoughtfully: Should he teach Dabai not to climb all over people?

…

Later in the afternoon, Bai Gaoxing finally sees his chance.

Li Pu has the habit of taking naps. While he might not sleep for long, he definitely falls asleep.

When napping, he always places his phone on the bedside table.

It is two o'clock now, when the sun is at its warmest and softest. Bai Gaoxing quietly peeks his head out of the door, eyeing the figure on the bed.

The sheer layer of the double curtains is fully drawn, blocking out the harsh sunlight. Li Pu is only covered with a thin blanket. Judging by his steady breathing, he is probably asleep.

As for why “probably”… Bai Gaoxing looks at the man lying with his back to the door and hesitates—he can’t see his face at all!

But no matter what, he has to get that phone. Bai Gaoxing slinks into the room, brushing against the doorframe, raising his claws as high as possible with each step to avoid the sound of his nails scraping against the wooden floor.

When he reaches the bed, Bai Gaoxing doesn’t dare to spread his wings and fly up. Instead, he bites down on the hanging bedsheet and climbs up like he is scaling a rock wall.

Being a spy isn’t as exhausting as this!

After finally reaching the top, Bai Gaoxing steps onto the soft quilt. He first glances at the bedside table on this side, then around the pillow.

Nothing.

A worst-case scenario creeps into his mind. Bai Gaoxing walks up to the pillow, using the height to sneak a look at the bedside table on the other side. Sure enough, it is over there!

This is bad news.

Bai Gaoxing stands on the pillow, pondering for a full two minutes, during which he stares blankly at Li Pu’s hair and ear. It isn’t until two sparrows fly past the window, with one shouting, “Chase me, c*nM!” that he snaps back to reality.

Why are these birds so rude… Bai Gaoxing shakes his head and refocuses on the plan.

After discarding the options of “stepping over Li Pu’s face” and “stepping over his body,” the only choice left is to go around where he won’t touch him.

Once decided, he quickly gets to work. Bai Gaoxing, known for his strong initiative, circles to the foot of the bed, choosing the farthest route. He stretches his neck to take a look at Li Pu’s face.

Li Pu’s eyes are closed—he is asleep.

Even fate is on his side.

Bai Gaoxing crawls forward. This position is a bit difficult for a parrot, but for a parrot who has been a university student, it is just right.

Soon, he stands on the bedside table.

But he doesn’t dare move.

The window is open, and Bai Gaoxing feels the breeze ruffle the feathers on his head. He watches the wind sweep over Li Pu’s forehead, fearing it might wake him up.

Thankfully, nothing happens. After a long internal struggle, Bai Gaoxing finally edges closer to the phone.

The phone hangs from its charging cable. He places one claw on the phone, grips the end of the cable tightly with the other claw, and pulls hard.

“Click.”

Bai Gaoxing immediately whips his head around to look at Li Pu.

The sound is almost imperceptible under normal circumstances, but in the silence of the room, it feels startlingly loud.

Fortunately, Li Pu remains undisturbed. His usually cold expression softens in sleep, and his face looks peaceful and beautiful.

Bai Gaoxing lets out a quiet sigh of relief. If he were still human, he’d definitely be sweating by now.

The next challenge is figuring out how to move the phone.

Bai Gaoxing briefly considers operating it right there under Li Pu’s nose, but that is far too risky. If Li Pu opens his eyes and sees him entering the password into the app, it’d be all over. It is safer to just take the phone away and pass it off as "a pet causing trouble."

The phone isn’t very heavy, and with a little effort, he can drag it. But since he plans to take the phone out of the bedroom, the question is how to do that without making any noise.

Bai Gaoxing gets to work, biting the phone case and starting to drag it. When he gets tired, he switches positions. Focused and determined, he efficiently drags the phone from the bedside table to the bed.

Just as he is about to drag it to the end of the bed, a deep voice interrupts:

“Dabai? What are you trying to do?”

Bai Gaoxing doesn’t think twice—he immediately dives into the quilt and plays dead.

He feels the breeze from Li Pu’s hand pass over him, and the phone he has worked so hard to steal is taken away. His heart pounds in his chest.

People can really scare birds to death!

While Bai Gaoxing remains motionless, pretending to be lifeless, Li Pu glances at his phone: it is 23% charged.

Looking at the parrot lying face down in the quilt as if trying to escape, Li Pu stifles a chuckle.

Feeling guilty after getting caught—clearly, Dabai knows he is up to no good.

Li Pu has never imagined that after just closing his eyes for a nap, he’d wake up to find his parrot sticking its rear out, attempting to steal his phone. He quietly observes for a while, not interfering—until Dabai is about to drag the phone away.

Li Pu lightly flicks Bai Gaoxing's beak. “Stop causing trouble.”

Now, the plan is completely ruined.

Bai Gaoxing gives up and rolls halfway onto his back, his two paws pointing to the sky, sighing inwardly.

Li Pu reaches out and scratches the parrot’s belly twice. There is no resistance, so his fingers glide through the snow-white feathers. But as he moves lower, his fingers suddenly stop near the tail.

Something feels off.

It is a bit hard, as if something has clumped together.

Now fully sitting up, Li Pu grabs Bai Gaoxing and pulls him closer. The parrot struggles in a panic as Li Pu inspects the feathers on his tail.

At some point, something oily has gotten on them and dried.

When did this happen? Was it during feeding? Or in the kitchen? Li Pu tries to recall, checking the quilt as well before picking up the big white parrot and carrying him off the bed.

Bai Gaoxing is carried all the way to the bathroom. Just as he is about to protest, he is plopped into the sink.

He looks up as the scent of shower gel fills the air when Li Pu presses the pump. Warm water pours over him, quickly soaking his feathers.

Bai Gaoxing soon realizes he must’ve gotten something dirty on him, so he tries to look at his tail. But it is hard to see the tip, and he spins around in the sink like a top trying to check.

“Don’t move.” Li Pu holds him down with his hand.

Bai Gaoxing closes his eyes. Who is spinning around just now? Not me—definitely not me!

After being scrubbed thoroughly like he is caught in a storm, Bai Gaoxing looks like a soaked, bedraggled chicken. Water drips from his nostrils, and he sneezes three times in a row.

Then, he sees Li Pu bringing over a small cage.

It is pink and shiny.

…

He never expects Li Pu to take him outside.

Bai Gaoxing dozes off under the warm sunlight.

Once his body is towel-dried and fluffed up with a hair dryer, he is placed into the portable cage that comes with his larger cage. Li Pu carries him downstairs to bask in the sun.

Who told him not to shake off water from his feathers?

Bai Gaoxing looks around. They are in the small park downstairs. There is no one else around at this hour, just the sound of the wind rustling through the trees. Li Pu has placed the cage in a semi-shaded spot where the soft sunlight streams in—not too hot, not too cold.

Bai Gaoxing yawns slowly and can't help closing his eyes for a moment.

When he opens them again, he sees the old man from downstairs chatting with Li Pu.

Taking a walk without his bird? Bai Gaoxing looks around but doesn’t spot the usual mahogany birdcage.

Li Pu also greets the old man and asks about the starling, but the old man sighs. “Xiaoguai has been feeling the heat lately, a bit out of sorts, so I didn’t bring it out.”

Heat? Bai Gaoxing smooths out his now-drying feathers. It’s only early summer—what’s going to happen when it gets even hotter?

Just then, the old man picks up his cage. Bai Gaoxing and the old man lock eyes for a long moment, then the old man chuckles. “You seem quite lively.”

Bai Gaoxing tilts his head and responds, “Not bad, not bad.”

The old man laughs, sets the cage down, and hands Li Pu a small can. “I’ve got plenty of this at home. Take a box.”

“This...”

“Take it.”

Seeing Li Pu about to refuse, the old man pushes the can into his hands and waves. “I’m off for a walk.”

The old man, still full of energy, quickly disappears down the path.

Bai Gaoxing grows anxious, looking at Li Pu with hopeful eyes. “Let’s go for a walk too! Come on!”

Please!

But Li Pu remains cold and indifferent. Seeing that Bai Gaoxing’s feathers have dried, he simply picks up the cage and heads back home.

Bai Gaoxing sulks. While he isn’t paying attention, Li Pu opens the can and glances inside. His expression freezes for a moment before he closes the lid and places the can under the lush spider plants on the balcony.

Soon, night falls again.

It is another quiet evening, with entertainment limited to watching TV and reading. But Bai Gaoxing doesn’t turn on the TV like he usually does. Instead, he sits to the side, distracted.

The anxiety of not being able to access the phone fades. Several hours have passed since the phone turned off that morning. Who knows what is happening online now?

If Li Pu’s company has found out... wouldn’t there have been a call by now?

Bai Gaoxing can’t help but glance at the phone on the couch. After staring at it for a dozen seconds, the screen lights up, startling him so much that he hurriedly walks a few steps forward. His claws get tangled, and he nearly rolls onto the couch.

Upon closer inspection, it is just a text message notification.

That night, Bai Gaoxing, who has become a real bundle of nerves, stays close to the phone, desperate to catch any updates. Every time Li Pu’s phone screen lights up, his feathers involuntarily stand on end.

In short: his scalp tingles the whole time.

Li Pu sits nearby, reading a script, thinking that his parrot is simply entertaining itself. He absentmindedly pets Bai Gaoxing a couple of times, curious why it isn't watching TV that night.

The waiting time feels incredibly long, but fortunately, no one calls.

Bai Gaoxing finally returns to the bedroom, utterly exhausted from concentrating for so long, yet feeling incredibly relaxed.

He lies down on the perch, gradually emptying his mind.

His only thought is: Li Pu's phone really gets a lot of spam messages.

…

Bai Gaoxing's concerns aren't unfounded, but the unexpected developments far exceed his imagination.

While he is unaware, the latest video starts to gain popularity.

The number of likes on the "Mua~" video gradually climbs, first surpassing 10,000, then 50,000, 100,000... After hitting 200,000 likes, the video is automatically featured on the platform's homepage.

More people begin to notice the account.

This means a significant number of short video enthusiasts and Li Pu's fans are tuning in.

【It can't be Li Pu himself, right? He’s never done this, we all know that…】

【I think it is. I checked the account, and the special suffix in the default ID is the same.】

【It must be Li Pu himself! Do you even understand how associated accounts work?】

The latest wave of fans who catch wind of this news begins to speculate.

What ultimately sways them toward believing it is the evidence presented by a few observant fans.

【Look at the table in the background. The pattern matches one from a photo Li Pu took two years ago in his Weibo album. It was during a book promotion.】

【Check the wall behind the parrot. Although it’s covered by a curtain, it’s clearly blue. The shadow next to it is uneven, and judging by the outline, it should be a book...】

【And Bai Gaoxing holding the microphone; if I remember correctly, that’s from the brand Li Pu previously endorsed. There are four colors, and they say they gave each spokesperson their own set…】

Fans itch to share this news in every group immediately! Adding a new entry! Creating buzz around the topic!

But their numbers are too few.

In the midst of millions, they are just a small fraction. If you exclude those who are merely attracted by looks or those too busy with school or work, the number of people who can take action is even smaller.

Plus, it is a weekday, and not many have caught the Live streaming. The account is relatively unknown and has never attracted much attention before. With the live stream ending soon, it is hard for others who aren’t aware of the situation to believe their one-sided claims.

So, before they receive any official confirmation, it is better for them to observe for now.

And they make a little wish: if only Li Pu would publicly confirm it on a widely recognized streaming account! That way, everyone could see!

【By the way, is this parrot a pet that Li Pu keeps?】

【I don’t know… There’s no news on Weibo, and I haven’t seen his company post any business photos.】

At the same time, a woman's surprised voice comes from an office at Star Entertainment.

“He really is interested in keeping pets.”

Of course, Lei Li also notices the comments made by those “eagle-eyed” fans, and at that moment, she scrolls through the fans' group of people who are following the news.

Amidst the flood of messages, many discuss Li Pu’s Live streaming account.

If not many paid attention to it last time, causing the news to quickly fade, this time it has already sparked a small-scale wave.

“What do you think Li Pu is thinking?” Lei Li murmurs to herself.

“Why does he have to post on a secondary account? Didn't I tell him that once the associated account reaches a certain level of heat, the work and Live streaming room will be directly showcased on the main account?”

As she speaks, Lei Li scoffs to herself, “Oh, he definitely didn’t take it to heart.”

She doesn’t quite understand. If he really wants to keep it private, he could easily create another account on a platform he hasn’t signed a contract with, and no one would recognize it.

“I think Brother Li may have his own reasons for doing this,” Mei Youshu says after a moment of thought, deciding to support Li Pu’s approach.

After all, he can’t fully grasp what Li Pu is thinking either.

But as an assistant, he still has to consider the artist’s interests, so he asks again, “Should I talk to Brother Li?”

Lei Li ponders for a moment, then nods, saying, “Okay, give him a little hint.”

She emphasizes the word “little,” adding “If he’s going to do this so ‘grandly,’ he should have been prepared long ago.”

Mei Youshu’s expression suddenly becomes serious, as if he is carrying a heavy responsibility.

That night, after working overtime and arriving home late, Mei Youshu spends a long time drafting a text message on his phone. After hesitating for a while, he chooses to send it at a scheduled time.

At this time, Brother Li should have gone to bed, so it is better to go to him in the morning.

Early the next morning, Li Pu sees the text message from his assistant.

【Brother Li, keep working hard!】

Li Pu: “……?”

Author’s note:

Mei Youshu: I just want to be a little...

Li Pu: Thank you, I’m just a clueless person.

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